So natural and pure. I love that the models are meant to be themselves and comfortable in their own skin. The images are very intimate and personal. Like Joan mentioned the vulnerability is very sexy. It may be very understated, but that’s the beauty of it. Sexiness doesn’t need to be over the top. It can be subtle.
Have you seen Picture Me? It’s a great film documenting Sara Ziff behind the scenes of her life as a working top model. Over the course of 5 years with the help of her cameraman(boyfriend Ole Schell), they kept a video diary of the ups and downs of the modeling world. I love a good documentary, especially when it’s anything remotely related to fashion.
In the beginning it’s really sweet and cute. You see her talking about a V Magazine shoot and see her walking to see her two billboards(Calvin Klein and Tommy Hilfiger). It’s the more glamourous side of things at first.
My favorite character in the documentary is an old woman, who I assume is her grandmother that referred to Sara Ziff as being ‘Sexy and Sullen, Sexy and Sullen.’ Her parents on the other hand wished her to go to school, which is a bulk of the documentary. Sara constantly talks about whether or not modeling was worth it anymore.
There’s also a darker side of the documentary when Sena Cech recounts a casting where she had to grab the photographer in a sexual way. She refused the job and the photographer never booked her again.
Modeling has always been about young, naive girls. That’s what the industry likes because they can exploit that.
I’m sort of at a crossroads right now. I feel like I have to choose between fashion weeks, when in all honesty they all have their pros and cons. New York, my dream city was the place I escaped to and finally started growing up. London, one of the most creative places on earth, and also home to the world renowned University of Arts London. Paris, the most beautiful and dream-worthy city, also home to my best friend.
How do I choose between the three of them?! That’s my dilemma. I was recently accepted into the London College of Fashion(about 20 days ago), and I’m so happy. I got into my dream foundation course that will lead me to Central Saint Martin’s Communications BA. As happy as I am, there’s a lot to factor into that. On the one hand LCF and UAL would really propel me to the heights that I’m gunning for. I can see a bright future if I were to take that path, but on the other hand, I’d be really far away from home, and since I’m a Cali boy, that’s a long ways away from home. It’s pretty much asking to have to skype my family and friends for the next 3 years. I’ve gotten so close to them and so used to being within the vicinity of people I care about. Also, I have a cat, and I’m pretty damn sure that dorms won’t allow little Spikey to bunk with me. He’s my son, and I refuse to let fashion school get in the way of that bond. I made a promise that he’d be with me every step of the way.
That brings me to Paris. In Paris, I have my best friend who’s practically a sister to me. She’s always been there for me even though we live half way across the world. Another great thing is that I also got accepted into Mod’Art Paris, which she just so happens to matriculate at as well. They focus mainly on management, which is fine, but my real passion is media, editorial and imagery. I’d be able to take advantage of their contacts and definitely excel there, but it’s not my dream job. It’s just, not many people have the opportunity to live in Paris with their best friend-I forgot to mention I can bring my cat!
Last, but not least New York…How I love you. You’ve been the center of my universe and all my decisions have revolved around you. I apologize, I’m having a moment here. As great as you are, and how I love you so, I can’t help but think it’s time to set my sights on Europe. I have to be honest that I am afraid of the natural disasters that keep hitting the east coast, but I almost want to be inaccessible for a period of my life. I want to experience different cultures.
So, New York is my favorite city, London is home to my dream school, and Paris is the home of my best friend and is the most affordable option. Gah!!! I don’t know. I still have to apply to FIT NYC and explore all three of my options.
Since I seem to be attracted to the world of retail shopping and customer service jobs, I had to think…How fake is my smile? Is it genuine? Is it escapism from conversation? Is it acceptance? What lies behind those pearly whites?
As I stood outside my porch to light up a tartar-inducing cigarette, it came to my mind that people hide behind their smiles. So what is the mystery behind my semi watt smile? What’s it all about? I hear compliments saying, “You have such a great smile,” or “you had braces huh?” What people don’t know is how much I have to strain to let that smile out. You literally have to pay me to do it. That’s exactly why I work in retail…I get paid to greet and service people regularly whether they deserve my kindness or not.
When a customer trots in; smile and greet. When a customer comes to the register; smile and ask how they are. When they finish the purchase; smile and thank them for coming in. I usually don’t have any hang ups about doing all that, but when I have to fake it for the not-so-friendly persons, I feel like I’m wasting good energy.
Yes, I’m not the first to say, but shoppers can be jerks. I know this is turning into a tirade on manners, but honestly, who raised some of the savages that come slumping into my work? Are they trained to view us blue collared workers as though we’re beneath them? Since, in their minds they believe that the few measly, crumpled, discolored dollars they lob on the counter is what’s putting food on my table. I don’t think so!
But alas, keep smiling Victor. You’ll need it if you’re going to save up for school. And that means dealing with the annoyance of public optimism. That is my mantra. As real or fake my grin may be, it always seem to remedy any issue and allow me to escape unscathed. How fake is your smile?